For the Love of Kembleford
by Dunced Goofball
Summary: Sidney Carter knew Elise Acker and waisted no time in introducing her to our favourite Kembleford Priest, Father Brown.
1. Introductions

_I have recently discovered this show and I have fallen madly in love at the first episode I saw. Not long after I fell in love with the show, I was having an affair on the show with Sidney Carter himself. That is one character I wouldn't mind meeting in real life._

 _I hope that you enjoy this little story. Each chapter will be views of my OC and how she fits into the life of Kembleford._

 _There will be no chronological order to how this story will progress as essentially it is a collection of drabbles/imagines I have put together._

 _ENJOY_

 _Goofball._

Introductions

Father Brown raised an eyebrow as he watched as Sidney unlocked the door in front of him with the key he had pulled from his trouser pocket. "I assume this is a regular occurrence?" Father Brown asked as Sid knocked twice loudly on the open door before walking straight in.

Sid turned to the Father with a smirk, "of course." Sid took note of Father Brown's incredulous look and rolled his eyes as he answered the rhetorical question the Father posed. "No Father. I use this key for nothing but good intentions."

The Father nodded, "and where shall we find Miss Acker?"

"Usually she is in the kitchen." Sid headed in that direction and sure enough they could hear movement as they got closer. "Says she gets the best light of the house there."

"That I do, Sid. What can I do for you today?" As they rounded the corner into the kitchen, the owner of the female voice came into view. She had her back to the gentlemen, with her hair wrapped into a thick cloth with spots of what Father Brown deduced to be paint. As Father Brown continued to examine the woman, he noticed more spots of paint across her blouse, trousers and boots.

Sid slid up beside Miss Acker, leaning his back against the counter and watching what she was doing before saying, "I've brought Father Brown in, said he wanted to speak with you."

The young woman, lifted her head to look at the man beside her who nodded his head in the Father's direction which in turn made her turn around to face the priest. "Elise Acker. Pleased to make your acquaintance." She said as she held her hand out for Father Brown to shake.


	2. Love of Treats

Love of Treats

One morning in Kembleford, with the sky overcast, would find Father Brown in the kitchen of the Presbytery in the presence of his most faithful and loyal of followers, Mrs McCarthy, Lady Felicia, Sidney and Miss Elise. The latter pair silently arguing over Miss Elise's jam scone as baked by Mrs McCarthy. Sidney had already enjoyed his own and as the others from the plate sat in the middle of the table had run out, Sidney was trying to partake in the last of the young lady's. Father Brown chuckled at the pair as every time Sidney came close to the plate, Miss Elise would alternate between grabbing his fingers and throwing his hand away and slapping the back of his hand with an eyebrow raised at him.

Eventually, Lady Felicia was watching the two and could not help but smile at them as Miss Elise shifted on her chair with her plate and scone in hand and turned her back to Sidney. She hunched over slightly as she tried to defend her scone from Sidney whilst trying to eat it as quickly as she could so he had nothing to pinch from her.

Just as Sidney was about to reach both hands to her waist to tickle her, she swung around to face them with a triumphant grin on her face with her cheeks puffed out. Easy to deduce that she had stuffed the last bit of her scone into her mouth; as Sidney worked this out, he chuckled and shook his head.

"Will you two stop acting like miscreants! That is not how a lady behaves!" Mrs McCarthy cried.

Swallowing the last bite of the scone, Elise laughed and faced Lady Felicia, "now, Lady Felicia, this is not how a Lady behaves so please do not let me see you doing so. I would rather not have Mrs McCarthy into a heart attack because we are both unladylike!"

Rather than be offended, Lady Felicia freely laughed at the younger woman as Mrs McCarthy's feathers became ruffled at their fun at her expense. The Mrs turned to Father Brown for assistance but was incredulous to discover that he was chuckling as well.

Shocked and highly scandalised, Mrs McCarthy threatened "no more baked treats for any of you!"

Elise laughed hard at the threat knowing that the Mrs wouldn't stop baking. Father Brown and Lady Felicia laughed as well. However, it was Sidney who gave the best reaction as he took Mrs McCarthy's threat seriously.

"You can't do that Mrs McCarthy! You'll be leaving me to starve since Elise can't bake!"

"Oi!"


	3. Fraternity

Fraternity

"A trainee priest?" Sidney asked in clarification, this was likely the worst thing Father Brown could have asked of him. "I've been to mass once in 15 years."

"Even then you probably never stayed through the whole thing." Elise added from Sidney's left. Lady Felicia shook her head with a smile at the two.

"Perhaps it does require a certain leap of faith." Father Brown commented wistfully.

Mrs McCarthy was scandalised by the Father's request, "the man is practically a heathen."

"Hey, there's no need for that!" Sidney cried, highly offended.

"There's every need, Sid." Elise laughed. "You drink and you smoke and you do everything in between." Sidney didn't respond to that, choosing instead to just scowl at the young woman.

"For once, I agree with Mrs M." Lady Felicia added in, one more person against Sidney's behaviour. Elise will admit, he's incredibly loyal but in no shape or form, a good candidate for Priesthood.

"He'd need to remember his catechism." Mrs McCarthy reminded the Father.

Lady Felicia listed another thing Sidney would have to remember in order for the guise to work, "mass prayers."

"And the order of responses." Mrs McCarthy finished.

"I could think of one now, if I weren't in polite company." Sidney sarcastically mentioned. Elise rubbed his shoulder in sympathy, unable to find no reason not to find this entire thing hilarious.

Lady Felicia continued, "a priest must hold himself in a certain manner. Modest and dignified."

Mrs McCarthy nodded in full agreement, "and has a vow of celibacy." She mentioned. Sidney did not like that comment, if his look towards Elise was any indication.

"I need help, of course." Father Brown finally commented. He had remained silent since he had first asked Sidney for his help.

"I am no help at all, Father." Elise was quick to remove herself from the picture. "I've never even been inside a church, let alone practised any of the teachings."

"I know by basic tenets." Lady Felicia offered.

Though Mrs McCarthy was quick to argue that, "even though you don't always act on them?"

Father Brown had no choice but to admit, "perhaps this is a bad idea."

"It's a shame about that." Elise said, leaning back in her chair, "fairly sure Sidney would have made a good priest. For all of 5 minutes."

"Not your finest hour, Father." Sidney comforted.

"Given the material we have to work with." Father Brown added.

"The good Lord himself would be put to the pin of his collar." Mrs McCarthy said as she began removing the cookies from the tray and putting them onto a plate.

"You don't think I can do it!" Sidney laughed as he looked at Father Brown, though, he did include Elise into that comment as he turned to her as well. She had shaken her head at him when he turned to face her, a grin on her lips.

Father Brown neither denied nor confirmed that statement as he stood up, "we'll have to leave it to the Kembleford Police."

"No, no, Sid Carter never ducks a challenge." Sidney declared as he hit the table with the palms of his hands and stood up next to Father Brown.

"This is going to be such a good show." Elise chuckled to Lady Felicia, before looking up at Sidney, "I hope you know that there is a chance you can be arrested for impersonating a priest?"

"All the more fun." Sidney said, keen to prove to the Father and his girlfriend that he can be a priest. He just chooses not to. "Five shillings says I can pull it off." Sidney bet Father Brown.

"Oh bravo!" Lady Felicia cheered. Elise was unable to say anything, too busy giggling.

"Done." Father Brown agreed, clasping hands with Sidney.

"A few Hail Mary's, how hard can it be?" Sidney joked. "Oh, hello." Sid found the cookies. Quickly pinching one before Mrs McCarthy could stop him, grabbed Elise's hand and together they left.

~ Fraternity ~

Elise couldn't believe her eyes when she walked into the kitchen of the Presbytery. "Sidney? Are you feeling ill?" Sidney Carter was willingly standing in one of Father Brown's black cassock. Mrs McCarthy had done a marvellous job resizing it. He had his clasped in front of him, a pair of glasses on his nose and his hair straightened.

"Our very own Father Brown converted the inconvertible Sidney Carter into the light of God?" Elise laughed as she took a seat to watch the spectacle. "I'm glad I arrived when I did, wouldn't miss this for anything."

Sidney couldn't look away from his girlfriend since she had arrived, "I'm beginning to regret this." Was all the comment he gave.

"Ah yes, celibacy. Good luck with that one, Sid." Elise chuckled.

"And as for that hand-me-down cassock." Lady Felicia commented.

"It was the best I could do under trying circumstances." Was Mrs McCarthy's explanation. Sidney had looked down at his new clothes, silently asking what was wrong. Elise still found it funny. "The Father has filled out in recent years."

"I'm never going to pull this off." Sidney said, his shoulders slumping as he resumed his natural behaviour. Discouraged that he would fail Father Brown.

However, Lady Felicia was quick to correct him. "Don't slouch, Sidney, it really isn't priestly."

The sound of a door opening and closing announced Father Brown's arrival. "Good you are here." He said as he walked into the kitchen.

Sidney immediately donned the persona of a Priest once more, to surprise the Father. "I trust your rounds were fortuitously blessed?" Elise descended into hysterics once more. Sidney Carter, Priest in Training.

"Don't think the glasses are too much?" Was Father Brown's response, not outwardly any emotion. Together the two of them turned to face the women in the room.

"I think they make him look cerebral." Lady Felicia replied.

"I've spoken to Father Palfreyman," Father Brown continued, "he is expecting his new arrival tonight."

"Heaven help us all." Mrs McCarthy prayed for everyone.

"It will take a miracle." Lady Felicia agreed.

"God, our Father," Sidney began to say, silencing the room, all crossing themselves in prayer, "please send us Holy Priests, all for the sacred and Eucharistic Heart of Jesus, all for the sorrowful and Immaculate Heart of Mary in union with Saint Joseph."

Mrs McCarthy and Lady Felicia were so impressed that simultaneously said, "amen."

"By Jove," Father Brown was also impressed, clapping Sidney on his shoulder in praise, "I think he's ready."

"I miss him already." Elise joked, pleased that Sidney smiled at her for it. "I am just a little disappointed I won't be receiving my usual farewell kiss from you Sidney."

"What?"

"You took a vow of celibacy, remember? When you made that bet?" Elise clarified. She rose to her feet to head towards the door. "Means you are not allowed any romantic attachments. Means you'll be sleeping all on your own now, Sid."

Sidney went to chase after his girlfriend but Father Brown grabbed his arm in silent reminder of his time as a Priest, allowing Elise to leave the Presbytery.

~ Fraternity ~

"Please tell me I can say it, Sid?"

"No, Elise."

She grabbed his hand tightly and looked at him with her biggest eyes possible, "please?" She asked in a whisper.

Sidney struggled to say no, to turn away from his girlfriend and leave the police station and not look back. But the longer Sidney kept looking at her, the less he was able to deny her. "Oh fine." He relented. "But just this once."

"I told you so!" Elise exclaimed, laughing. "I told you impersonating a priest was likely going to get you arrested."

Father Brown was standing outside with Sidney and Elise. "Four hours in a police cell." Sidney said as he lit a cigarette and wrapped his arm around the young woman's waist. "They have not heard the last of this." He said to the Father.

"At least he didn't charge you." Father Brown said sympathetically.

"I cannot wait to get out of this cassock. I don't know how you can ride a bike in these things." Sidney complained as he pulled at the white collar.

"For the collection, Father." A lovely, elderly lady said as she walked up to Father Brown and Sidney.

"Most generous, madam. Go with God." Charmed Sidney as he accepted the money. "Red Lion. She's buying. Things are looking up." Sidney added with joy as he realised how much money the lady had given.

"And there I was hoping for a Damascene conversion."

"You'd be lucky."

"That belongs to the church, Sidney!"

"I won't tell if you won't."

"No, of course you won't Sidney." Elise chimed, stepping in between the two men. Snatching the 10 shillings out of Sidney's hand before he even realised what was happening and quickly passing it to Father Brown who kept a tight hold of it to put to the collection for the church as per the Lady's request. "Go Father! Before he tries to take it back!"


End file.
